their definition of "care" has to do about what's *CONVENIENT* for them MORE than anything.

i'm watching 50 first dates on tv for probably the millionth time and i find some similarities between my own situation and what happens to drew barrymore on the movie. she was injured in a car accident also and has a traumatic brain injury as a result and her family basically gaslights her into thinking nothing went wrong, so she doesn't have to deal with the difficulties a person with a tbi usually has to deal with. i can see my family doing this to me if they had the opportunity if so many memories didn't surround me which contrast the truth. it's also why i haven't gotten MORE done with my life to rehabilitate myself. paying attention to my problems requires too much time and care for it to be convenient or beneficial for them. at least drew barrymore on the movie HAS her damn driver's license. BET THEY MADE HER WASTE HER TIME AND LIFE AT COURAGE KENNY IN ORDER TO GET IT! RIGHT AMANDA?! courage kenny also played a role in GASLIGHTING me because most, if not all, of my cell phone videos of me in rehabilitation practicing walking when i was going there are DELETED from facebook and they treat me like they have to put me BACK on all them easy machines which my living room wall could operate when i went there because God forbid, i made ANY progression because then i wouldn't need to pay them anymore to "help" me do the SAME SHIT i've been doing for years and think i'm actually getting stronger. so- AGAIN.. for my mental health- i'm choosing to avoid going to that overrated pathetic excuse of a "rehabilitation" facility. so with that said- family is SUPPOSED to be SUPPORTIVE and NOT enabling gaslighting of the family member who they SUPPOSEDLY "care" about just for their own fucking convenience. it's unbelievable and incredibly SAD that i have to put up with this kind of abuse after EVERYTHING i've been through- "recovering" from my tbi is more depressing and stressful than the ACTUAL accident itself. the only family member who has WILLINGLY and GENUINELY been there for me is joe. the rest of my family were all basically forced by my grandma to help or "care" about me.
i got up earlier than usual this morning to have a phone interview with someone about a hotel front desk position because they had told me they read my resume on ziprecruiter. they were going through the tasks of the particular position and i said, "i'm sure i can do all of the things you listed." then the lady went into the hours i'd need to work and it didn't sound like part-time hours, so i asked her if this was a part-time position and she said, "no.. it's full time." then i said, "well, i'm sorry. i can only work part-time." and she said, "oh. okay. have a good day." i have this same problem ALL the time and i always make sure it's part-time i'm looking into- i'm not sure if the employer just tries to slip people into a full-time position without really knowing what they're REALLY getting into? trust me. if i could work full time- i'd be all in. it's something to do with how much government assistance i get and not really if i could physically handle the work. God forbid a vulnerable adult gets the same opportunities as a regular person. ah well. just gonna have to keep at it. i might be the age of retirement by the time someone actually gives me a shot.